Sunday at church my pastor spoke on the famous verse where it says to "turn the other cheek". He had an amazing view of it though. He spoke about how when people try and shame you (which was the reference to a back-handed slap on the cheek on biblical days), to not walk away defeated, but instead to offer grace. In doing so it provokes the question "why?", and then we can be glorifying Jesus in a powerful way. Little did I know how much this would play into my next few days.
I was sort of backhanded in a very slight way by someone today, slight but pretty painful. They basically accused me of/made fun of me for supposedly "listing a long line of complaints and then ending it with 'But I'm trying to stay positive'". They didn't say it to my face or anything, just mentioned it as sort of a ridicule to my character. At first I immediately felt angry and irritated. Who are they to judge and make snide comments like that? And then I started to feel guilty about my testimony being tainted. But THEN as I was thinking about it I started realizing the real problem with this whole comment.
Synopsis of my day: (just so you know this is going somewhere...)
My car broke down and I was up since 5am this morning getting it situated so that it would hopefully be a quick fix, turned out NOT to be a quick fix (it's still in the shop)and found out it's going to be a lot more expensive than I thought (at least $300-$400), then I finally made it to a Starbucks only to find out AFTER the guy had given me my coffee and pastry that I had forgot my wallet at home, then after getting dropped off with my mom at an area we could walk around and shop and have dinner I realized I didn't have my phone and therefore had no way of getting a hold of someone for a ride back because I didn't have my stupid car and on and on and on...just one of those days. We all have them.
I'm sure at some point complaining gets annoying, but since when does it NOT go together with trying to stay positive? In my mind those two things MUST go together. One without the other is just too overwhelming. Simply complaining without an ounce of positivity will get annoying and depressing quickly, but on the other hand, ONLY being positive is just as annoying sometimes to me; and, quite honestly, unrealistic. We must be real about the fact that we have bad days, life is not always flowers and butterflies, and if we can't just let it out once in a while then we hold it in, feel a lot of pressure to put on a happy face and become completely overwhelmed. Not only then do we have bad days, but we have the added stress of trying to make it look like we don't have bad days.
I'm not perfect. Life isn't either. But that is not to be linked to God. God IS perfect. He is never bad just because bad things happen. That is one distinction I always try and remind myself of....therefore some days I WILL list complaints, simply to get them off of my chest, but I will ALWAYS try and bring it back to positivity and TRUTH. For a large part of my life I tried to put on a happy face and I had major guilt issues associated with any sort of bad day, and that is not how Christ wants us to live. The Bible is FULL of His people lamenting their sorrows onto Him. He only asks that we let it out, and then still believe that He is GOOD. And I BELIEVE HE IS GOOD. I will speak on that just as much (if not hopefully more most days) as I will speak my heart and let you know if I need prayer for things that are falling apart around me! If we can't be real with others and most of all JESUS, then He can't be real with us.
So yes...I had an exhausting, frustrating day, I've had worse and I've had better...but God is still good and therefore I can look forward to tomorrow being brand new! SO I would love to honestly, from the depths of my heart, thank those of you who are in my life and let me vent once in a while without judging me. And thank you for helping me focus on the truth and goodness of God that is still the same at the end of every day. Hopefully I can be the same source of comfort for ALL of you as well. :)
