Ready

I'm feeling so out of place right now, I have no "home" although I'm SO THANKFUL to Liz and Jeff and Bob for letting me live/keep all of my junk at their places. I am out of a job in a couple of days, living out of suitcases, etc...I guess it's good preparation, but I even felt more "settled" in Nicaragua then I do now. It's hard to have NO routine, and NO schedule. It has freed me up to be able to see all of you loverly's :) Many more happy hours are ahead before I leave...let me tell you dat!! :) (That's for you Mario). But I tend to be very quick to change moods these days, probably because of that. If you know me, I'm already moody so I'm working on that. I start to feel really overwhelmed very quickly by the most unusual things. Not good...already my tendency, but not good. I'm so blessed though to be surrounded by so many people who are supporting me in this! Thank you to all of you! (You know who you are!)

I just want to live as if I was created for this day specifically. I know in my head that I am, but I don't always allow that to sink into my heart and LIVE like it. I don't want to wait until I get to Nicaragua. I can't just put off my "growth" and "learning" to the day that I get down to Nica, because guaranteed I'm not going to feel so overwhelmed by God's purpose every second down there...so I need to start here. Now. Where God has placed me. I'm reading this book called "To Live Is Christ" by Beth Moore about the passion of Paul. Very inspiring, but interesting reading about Paul while he was still Saul...The first mention of Saul in the Bible was at the stoning of Stephen (the first Christian martyr). And so they started describing Stephen. It's true that most of us would struggle with naming all of the disciples, but ask us who the first martyr was and most of us can tell you! If not, then now you know! You're welcome. :)

Stephen very well could have been created for THAT DAY alone. God uses us everywhere and everyday, but I believe that the PURPOSE of Stephen was fulfilled in that day. Even him crying out to God to not condemn those who were there probably had a HUGE part in the salvation of Saul...and we all know where that led...if you don't, just read most of the new testament...I promise, it's not as boring as you may think!

I want to live so that when my last day comes I wasn't putting anything off. Stephen may or may not have known that that was going to be his last day, but what I do know is that he was READY in case it was.
May we all live in a state where every day we are ready.